Introverts, let me tell you, as if this quarantine hasn’t been enough, now we get May Day. May Day is an introvert’s dream come true, when your friends say, “Hi, I care,” and then run away and leave you alone in your own quiet.
A friend of mine has started texting “May Day Drop” when she randomly leaves things for me on the black bench next to my front door. It feels like a greater level of kindness as she sees what I need, which is sometimes space. If I May Day Dropped something at her house, it might hurt her feelings. She says she would want to see me, although my introvert brain can’t register why, in the midst of quiet, she would want me to come in.
This is something we may want to consider when it comes to friendship: the truest of friends will meet you in the way that you need, rather than the way they need to be cared for. Sometimes it may mean that we get together to chat even when I feel like I have no words, but it also means that sometimes she May Day Drops my house.
One thing we have all seen in this last series of weeks is that life was not meant to be done alone. It also wasn’t meant to be done “our way” all the time. As we rewrite what gathering and connectedness look like, consider your friendships with eyes to see what they may need, and if you can’t figure it out, ask. They may need you to sit in the driveway (six feet away), or May Day bombing may be their dream come true.
You are uniquely designed by the perfect designer. Our God doesn’t mess up, and it’s okay to be who you are. Friendship can mean bending what we would prefer to meet our friends in what they need. This time of reflection may have given us more time to learn some things about ourselves and the people we care about. Give yourself permission to be your authentic self and your friends the grace to be theirs. Meeting them in that spot, giving the time and space to understand each other, to be known, is where depth in friendship can be found.
I’m not so sure you need Myers-Briggs to tell you if your friend is an introvert or extrovert. You may just need to ask them how they feel about May Day.
