I will not do petty.
This is rule number two that I have when it comes to how I will choose to live. It guides my mind and protects my heart. I will not be consumed by things that are not a big deal or won’t be changed by my participation in them.
My mom has given me a hard time about it forever…my “less mature” self would make an actual flicking motion, pressing my pointer finger against my thumb and flicking the situation away.
It was a physical demonstration to myself that whatever had crossed my path, I was done with it, and it didn’t get any more attention. I was visualizing it flying across the room, out of sight. Even now, if I’m trying to get my point across to my poor mother (and I admit it’s a bit childish), I still do it. It’s my way of saying, “That is gone.” Over the years I was expressing, “I won’t do petty. I’m not going to give oxygen or mental space to things that don’t deserve my attention…and will only tear me apart.”
My “more mature” self doesn’t have to physically flick at the air (usually), but I still repeat to myself, “That is not worth my breath…I’m done with this,” and let it go. I have to say it less frequently now because it is becoming the pattern of my days.
We must refuse to make a big deal out of things that are not a big deal. We can stop ourselves in our tracks literally by saying, “I don’t do petty,” flick it out of our minds, and move on.
Petty is often tied with pride and holding on tightly to what is yours. Refusing to do petty means apologizing even when it’s not your fault. It sets the precedent of humility where your heart doesn’t fight for what you deserve but where you will choose to apologize even if you are simply misunderstood. It’s refusing to get upset about little things and double standards.
Remember the immature “lists” of who the cutest boys were in middle school? A few weeks ago a boy we had at our house told me his parents made of list combining our kids and their kids in order of intelligence. (Insert cartoon mom with smoke coming out of her ears.) Now…I have the natural mom instincts. “Kick me in the shins and I’ll go get a bandaid, but kick my kids and I want to throw you out with the bandaids.” I’m no saint…yet…recognizing that his parents were likely trying to build his self-esteem, choosing to not do petty meant I had to choose to pour out grace and let it go…even if letting it go felt like my “I don’t do petty,” was tethered to a concrete pillar that I had to try and push off a cliff.
When a petty situation crosses your path…push it off the cliff. Refuse to give it the attention it does not deserve. Name it petty and walk away free.
When we know the story-within-the-story and are watching life unfold on our walk towards forever with our Savior, we don’t need to worry because we aren’t fighting for what’s ours, we are living for what is His.
When you don’t waste your time on petty, you get to live for the things that make your heart sing. “I will not do petty.” Say it out loud. Set your heart free.
