If you’ve ever checked out our bio page, you will see that I am from a small town, homeschool my kids, love Diet Pepsi… you know the usual bio stuff. One thing that it doesn’t mention is that I had a severe concussion years ago that caused debilitating traumatic brain injury problems. There is no need now to go into all of the issues it caused, but one thing I will share is that seeing movement, any kind of constant movement, made me about want to scream and thrust a knife into my head. (I know, that sounds dramatic.)
After lots of vision therapy, these symptoms are so much better. Praise Jesus! I even verbalized the words “I feel better” during an evening with my close gal pals. Isn’t it scary to sometimes acknowledge those types of things out loud for the fear that the next day you could go right back to where you were?
Well, that’s precisely what happened, in a flurry! And I was just about to embark with my family on a cruise boat. Hello, nightmare vacation.
One other thing I verbalized that same night with my sweet friends was that I wanted my prayer life to change. In Mark Batterson’s book “Draw the Circle,” these words convicted me:
“Proclaim His power, Declare His sovereignty, Affirm his faithfulness, Stand on His word, Cling to His promises.”
So in prayer, that was going to be my new battle plan. As well as changing two things…
1. I wanted to pray big prayers and see God show up in big ways again in my life. I realized that over the years, my prayers had gotten smaller and smaller, and I was wondering if that was because I was setting limits on what I thought God could actually do. And…
2. I wanted to pray for things and then release them. Meaning, in the past, I have prayed for something and then tried to “micromanage it” into being. This was showing a lack of trust that was filtering into my relationship with Him. I wanted that to change.
So back to the concussion… And the boat… and the desire to possibly jump ship on it all. I texted my friends to cover my health in prayer, and then I realized that I was the one who truly needed to get on my knees. Not that having friends praying for you is bad. It’s not. It’s needed. But I was the one who said I wanted to focus on praying big things. I was the one who said I wanted to pray and then release it to the God of the universe who controls it all. I was the one who wanted my relationship with the creator of the universe to be strong and healthy, where at times, I had let it fail. So there I went.
I prayed a bold prayer of healing and boarded the swaying boat with a bag of seasickness medicines and three very excited (very MOVING) kiddos.
Then the very best thing happened. When the boat started to set sail, it was as if a breath of fresh air entered, and all of my symptoms left. They were just gone! The boat felt still, the waves were small, and when we reached our destination, there was no wind. No movement. No swaying of palm trees and the twirling of my kids brought me pure joy instead of pain. It continued like this until the last day when we headed inside the boat for a program, and then the winds blew, and the rains came. It was if God wanted me to notice that His mighty right hand had been holding back the winds just for me.
Maybe one might say it was a coincidence. For me, it was a big prayer, and God showed up in a personal way. When you know the God who can move mountains, you believe that your prayers can stop the winds.
I read this song of David’s the other day, and it was all I could do not to cry.
“Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
He calmed the storm to a whisper
and stilled the waves.
What a blessing was that stillness
as he brought them safely into harbor!
Psalms 107: 28-30
Not all of us get to see our prayers answered immediately and with such intensity. I have several prayers I have been praying for years and will be until the day they are answered. We are impatient people. We live in a Google world where every question is answered in a matter of seconds. But, our gracious God doesn’t always respond that way. He wants the relationship within the conversation. He wants our trust and desires for us to believe in His timing.
Maybe this is a year where you need to focus more on prayer as well. Take more time to talk with God. The more you talk to Him, I promise you the more you will hear His voice and see Him in the everyday. And friends, it’s the best. HLLF –
