Well, this was not the plan.

I’m pretty sure that everyone has said something like that as we all have rearranged our schedules, plans… life over the past few months.  To say that this type of change can bring about some stress is a huge understatement!

I’m finding that there are more days where my patience is running thinner than others.  An eye roll from my oldest today about sent me over the edge when last spring it may not have.  So, I’m readdressing some important things that I need to focus on to create an emotionally healthy space where my people can thrive.  I have made a list that is making a difference for me mentally, and I would love to share it with you.


1.  Let the little stuff slide. Some days my people are grumpy. Maybe my husband had a tough day, and he snaps back at something that normally wouldn’t bother him. Let it slide. Choose to think the best of your people and give them grace. It’s a good time to be gentle to yourself and the people you love. 

2.  Let go of personal imperfections.  Ugh. I have spent way too much time in my closet trying on clothes to make me feel better about myself.  COVID -19 has not been my friend in this department. My daughter recently said, “Don’t you think you look beautiful when you look in the mirror?” Um, no. But my kids do. That’s better than the perfect outfit, or crying over extra pounds. Find reassurance in the fact you are beautiful in the eyes of the people that matter most. 

3.  Let my kids make mistakes. They will over and over. Instead of getting upset, use it as a time to teach. The more teaching moments, the better.

4.  Stop yelling.  Unless they are running into the street and a car is coming, try to cut out the yelling. The end.

5.  Learn to take care of myself.  This is a work in process, but I know when I am taking better care of myself, the rest of the family ends up being better-taken care of too.

6.  Be content.  It’s so easy for all of us to live aware of what others have that we don’t; this builds resentment and eliminates joy.  We are making this a significant focus in our home… to do everything we can to avoid raising kids with an entitlement mentality.  

7.  Verbalize, “I love you.”  Make sure you are telling your people every day, “I love you.” If you find the days are going by without verbally telling your people that, put a reminder on your phone. Just do it. They can’t hear it enough. 

8.  Be the boss. Don’t let what other people are doing dictate or influence the decisions you make for your family. Lean in to what you know God has called you to do.  If everyone is playing a video game that you are not okay with, don’t let your kids play it. Be in control of what you can control. Set boundaries for your family.

9. Be adaptable.  This time right now is teaching us all about adaptability!  Knowing that change is inevitable will help you hold on to things just a little less tightly. Jesus is the one thing that doesn’t change. He can be the constant that solidifies your life. Hold on to Him with everything you’ve got; the rest of it hold loosely to allow yourself to truly live freely.  

10.  Lean into God  – God is for you. He wants you to depend on him.  Start each day with a simple prayer of  “God, you have a path for me, and I surrender to your lead. I want to follow what you have for my life.”