Today you may need to hear…obligatory card holidays are stupid and you are not alone.

This weekend is Father’s Day, and if your dad was crummy…know that you are not the only one with three blank robot cards sitting up in your cabinet, purchased because you want so badly to be normal and you just can’t find it in your heart to send your crummy dad a “World’s Best Dad” card. Yet as you read through the generic ones, it just points out the gap more and more between the way you wish things were and the reality you experience. Unsent because although buying a card on an obligatory card holiday, seems obligatory, you just can’t find it within yourself to get the card into the mailbox.  

As you walk by the card aisle, you see all of the cards you wish you were buying your husband, but your empty tummy and heart cry out in pain…or you count out the cards for their daddy, and you wonder, do you buy three or four and the ache deepens as you miss your baby who can no longer give their daddy a card.

Card holidays hurt feelings, because as much as we wish it to be true, this life is not lived in the Hallmark aisle. The cards glare back at us…this is the way life should be, this is the way everyone else’s lives are…and maybe it is…maybe even yours is. You can still buy your card, but be aware of what these obligatory holidays do. For the gal down the aisle, be aware that this social norm is breaking her heart. Let her know that you see her. That God sees her, and that He wishes she could buy that “World’s Best Dad” card as much as she does. Let’s take a step back and consider the reality that those we love are experiencing.

I’m not saying you don’t purchase your “World’s Best Dad” card if you truly do have the world’s best dad. I’ve got a good one. But I’ll do it remembering those who don’t, those who would love the make their husband a daddy, and those who will celebrate without all of their kids, or maybe tragically without their dad at all this year. I’ll ask God to fill the gap like only He can and I’ll anticipate the day when He makes all things new, restoring what He longs to restore, which these stupid card holidays may remind you is your heart.

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